Finished.

J.P. Morgan’s recruitment video had finally come to an end. We had spent months planning and filming this corporate video; and now it was finally over.

It was tough. A real challenge. But where to begin…

I was getting more and more stressed the days leading up to the big shoot. Complications arose with changes in camera management, ideas, shot lists, contributors, and with other work piling on top. But also because a film I was destined to see would be stricken from me.

Star Wars means so much to me. It is more than a collection of films, toys, and music. There is an emotional connection between Star Wars and me – the relatability I have with the conflict within Luke and Vader, the memories I have had as a child watching, playing, or talking about the saga, the experiences I have had through events. I had booked my tickets to see Star Wars Rogue One at the BFI in London for their midnight premier on the night ticket sales were released. I was at home when they were released and I had no laptop or computer with me, so I used my father’s laptop, waiting in the study for midnight for Odeon to release the tickets and purchase them. At the time I did not know we would be filming on the day of Star Wars. To me, because my university calendar was blank for that week, I was free to do what I wanted.

But then came the big day. The group had described it as “All hands on deck” with a nine hour shooting day. I was distraught. The one thing that was keeping me going through that entire ordeal was being taken from me. Hundreds of pounds wasted as I would not be able to travel or return from London for the film. I would not be able to see my best friend who I had not seen since September. And I would not be able to see Star Wars and be part of the phenomenon by attending a midnight premier in a sold out IMAX.

I was upset. So much to the point I had finally broken. I was in tears. My parents phoned me to wish me luck travelling up to London for this event not knowing I would not be able to see it. For all they knew, they were excited I had purchased midnight premier tickets. And I just broke. Shouted at them over the phone how I could not see something that I had raised so high as my saviour from a spiralling mess of depression and stress.

Though, the force is strong in my family. They too were upset that I would not be able to see it in London, but were still encouraging me to see the film anyway. My brother, who phoned after wondering if I were to stay at his when I would potentially arrive in London, made it imperative that I see the film. He is not a Star Wars fan, but knew how much those nerdy sci-fi movies mean to me. Lastly, I needed further advice. My friends at uni. Now I do not know if I called them or they called me, but I remember my friend Thomas saying I should see it whatever the consequences. Likewise, Chris, was also encouraging.

So I did it. I went to go see Star Wars at the Odeon in Bournemouth. THey still had tickets. They do not reserve seats like the IMAX or other cinemas. So there was a chance I could still purchase a ticket and get a seat. I quickly booked a ticket online, whipped on my limited edition Star Wars shirt, and sprayed most of a can of deodorant on my body.

I had not washed in three days or changed my shirt in a week. I doubt I had eaten the previous day and I know I went out without dinner. My hear was greasy, my pits smelly, and my face beardy. But I had finally broken. So nothing would now stop me from seeing this film. I had to see it.

I knocked on my housemates door first to see if the guy would be kind enough to give me a lift to the cinema, however, he had been drinking. So I ran. I ran to the cinema whilst dialling all the people who had encouraged me to see the film that I was seeing Star Wars.

There were twenty minutes on the clock. The film started at midnight. And I was running. Would I make it to the cinema in time? In time to print and collect my ticket? In time to still grab a good seat? In time to wait in the queue? I continued to run.

I made it. I casually merged into the queue to collect my ticket. The line for collection was thankfully shorter than the line for purchasing at the door. I walked up the stairs to Screen 1 and was mesmerised by the buzzing crowd all there to nerd-out at the same film. Amazingly, I got a really good seat, which was almost middle-middle.

The film began and I had already started to cry. The sound, the image, the experience! The feeling in the cinema even!

The film had a euphoric effect on me. All my emotions, weight on my shoulders, stress, insecurity; had all been lifted from me. Time stood still in the real world as I watched this film.

The film ended and I was in tears. But I was also relieved, for I had finally seen Star Wars, and at midnight before anyone else.

For that one moment everything was almost over. The only thing left to do was J.P. Morgan.